OK magazine has already expressed concern that it may have to cut its issue in half while Hello said the news was a disaster for the free press.
Paparazzi were also wearing haunted looks this morning, with some saying ‘that they will have to try and sell some Tom Cruise snaps’.
A Milan outsiders said: “David was in tears when he realised that he would be missing the Blockbuster Action Stunt of the Year Awards and it looks like he will also be unfit for the Hollywood Animal Performance Oscars where he was due to present Unhappy Seal Performance of the Year.
"We can confirm that he was injured while trying to diagonally position his head on the new ladies soap range launched by Silvio Berlusconi."
Football experts have predicted that World Cup hype will fall 20% following Beckham’s withdrawal.
An FA insider said: "We fear that we may lose the 'Loose Women' demographic which is a disaster.
“We are devastated that we won’t be able to bring David on for the last five minutes of very game.
“This basically going to ruin the World Cup because I am sure most people were going there purely to see Becks take a corner.”
The race to replace Beckham:
Shawn Wright-Philips – minor celebrity, unlikely to win hair endorsements.
Theo Walcott – in a relationship but concerns over whether his mummy will let him stay up late.
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